Dreams

Last night my brother- and sister-in-law came over and brought their 7 month old baby, Jaden, with them. It was fun - I got to hold him for quite a while, since he was happy and had a full tummy! He would grab my hair and tug and grab my nose with a really slobbery hand, but it was so fun, even if my nose was slobbered on! He would stand on my lap and twirl around in circles, probably so he could see everything going on. He's teething and tried to put my finger in his mouth to chomp on - Liz quickly warned me that his teeth are sharp!

So, of course, I got baby fever... I ended up having a dream that someone gave me their baby to take care of, and I had to go to Target to get all the things I needed to take care of him - diapers, wipes, bottles, blankets, food, etc. The whole time, I was holding the baby in my arms, and I didn't have a cart or a stroller, so I was trying to hold all my purchases in my arms as well, and it didn't work very well! Then, I got up to the register to pay, and I didn't have enough money. Needless to say, I think I have some reservations about having children right now. The dream was living proof!

Dreams are so strange. They're so real and life-like, yet when you wake up, you often forget them immediately. When I was in high school and college I used to have nightmares. Once, my freshman year of college, I had such a terrible nightmare, I had to call my parents at 2:00 am because I was SO freaked out! Luckily I have understanding parents. However, I took a walk down the hall to get a drink, and found one of the girls from my hall still awake. She said someone was playing with a ouija board. She attributed my nightmare with that! I freaked out even more, needless to say...

Sometimes I have dreams that I kissing men...men that aren't my husband! When I told my husband I had one of those dreams, he was quite offended, so I don't tell him those anymore...
I've been having quite a few high school dreams over the past 4 or 5 months. High school was a good and bad time for me, like most people. These dreams are usually quite anxiety provoking! I believe I'm having them because my 10 year class reunion is this summer, much to my chagrin. I still don't want to see those people. I think I shall not go!

My dad always told me that dreams are what keep us sane. Maybe this is true, but most of the time mine give me more distress than sanity!

Today I'm having a craving for an iced caramel macchiato from Starbucks. I think I'll take my Bible there this afternoon and do some reading.

If you're looking for a great CD to listen to, I suggest Shane and Shane's "Psalms." It's great Biblical lyrics set to awesome guitar. Their voices are also very good together. It would go well with a caramel macchiato!

Protein Drinks and Job Interviews

I have recently discovered the wonder that is the Protein Drink. Mine specifically has coffee in it (imagine that...) and is low carb. I say that it is a "wonder" because it's like a little burst of energy in a drink pack! I rip the top off, sip, and suddenly I'm feeling awake and alive and normal. This is how I survive when I have to get up early in the morning to do something. Heather doesn't like to get up early in the morning to do anything! I highly recommend EAS Cafe Caramel.

My husband has a job interview tonight!!!!! We are especially excited about this interview because it is actually in his field. Chris has been looking for a youth pastor position since last June, approximately. He's been close once or twice, but it's not been the right thing, apparently. This time the setting is perfect...a Baptist church in a smaller town. Right up Chris' alley. This also means a possible move...again! But not too far away, and to a very cute, quaint town on the river. We'll see! For anyone reading this, please pray!

I have now been sitting in front of my computer for over an hour. What a waste.
I now must clean my house and take a shower and later, after lunch, go to work. Alas.

Special play, men dressed in skirts, and sad events

Saturday when I got home from the Twin Cities, I got to go shopping for Special Play items. What is "special play" you ask? Special Play is when a child is given a box of random items and is told to be creative, make up stories, and play like any normal child would, except it is done with one parent sitting directly in front of them. The parent is instructed to ask questions like, "And then what?" "How does that work?" "What are you going to put with this?" And to say things like, "You're making a very nice sculpture." "You are good at story telling." And the like. The point of this play is to unite parent and child in special play that is meant only for the two of them, for that moment in time. Nobody gets to interrupt, and nobody else gets to join in. I have a client to whom I am going to teach special play tomorrow and I had to get ready for it.

I bought the following:
a plastic orange
a paint brush
metallic pipe cleaners
pom poms
a tucan bobblehead
paper cups
shower curtain rings

This should be interesting!

On Sunday my husband and I went to Barnes and Noble. We were sitting in the comfy chairs. Now picture this: There are four comfy chairs. Two are occupied by the Bjurs and the other two are occupied by a college age looking girl, and a middle aged woman. The college age girl gets up from her comfy chair to go look at something, and leaves her book on her chair, in order to save her spot. I didn't think anything of it. Suddenly someone comes up beside me, and in a gruff voice, says, "Is someone sitting in that chair?" I look up to see before me a large, middle aged man dressed in a skirt, with a five-o-clock shadow and a purse slung over his shoulder! I smiled and said every-so-calmly, "Yes, I believe a girl was sitting there." "Harumph," Mr. Cross Dresser says, "Figures." And walks away. I looked at my husband...he looks at the man/woman walking away, and suddenly his eyes about pop out of his head! It was the funniest thing I've ever seen! (Not the cross dresser, the look on my husband's face!!)

I was speaking with my mother on Sunday afternoon and she told me that a sophomore from my high school died the other night from alcohol poisoning. I will never understand high schoolers who do this to themselves. A sophomore! It's so sad.

The Accused Gets Revenge

Today I was grievously accused of hiding one of my friend, Erin's, shoes! The gall!! So, in order to recover my dignity, I purchased a pair of shoes quite similar to the ones in question, and went to Erin's place of work, and placed them on her windshield!

A couple hours later, my phone rang and Erin's name showed up on my caller i.d.
"Hello!?"
"ARE YOU INSANE!?!?!?!" <>
"Of course I am, I'm your friend, aren't I?!?!"
<>

It was quite humorous. Especially because I was in TJ Maxx at the time with clothing in my paws!

Ahhh, the practical joke. You've gotta love it.

The Three P's

My mentor and Bible Study Fellowship teacher, Jo, says that God Pursues us, he Protects us, and he Provides for us. Today, when we met, we included the fourth "P" - Prepare.

We were studying John 1: 19-23. The truth about God in this passage (that I found) was that God prepares his people. The way that I struggle with that thought is that sometimes preparation is painful and miserable, but the outcome incredible. Jo even prays (when she goes through a preparation or struggling time) to keep her in that time because being in pain is better than being lukewarm, or apathetic. Like the passage where God says that he will spit those who are lukewarm out of his mouth. He'd rather we be hot or cold. That passage refers to the springs in Israel - where a cool stream and a hot spring run together, the water is lukewarm and is not good to drink, nothing grows or thrives there, either.

I believe God is like this because in this preparation time that we've all gone through, often it hones our minds and our hearts to be more like Christ, to see more clearly, and hopefully, to not have to be "prepared" in that certain way again! God has demonstrated this to me through the events of the past 5 months. I thought that a decision I had made was the right decision, that I was in God's will and that everything was cool. Now, I'm coming to see that yes, the decision was right for that time, but it was to bring me to a new place, another journey. This place is God's will, too, I believe. That doesn't make the previous place wrong, it's part of the process: the preparation. And, most likely, the new journey will be a preparation for another one. I'm learning that life isn't a destination, but a journey. I always thought it was a destination: When I graduate from college, I'll be happy; when I get married, I'll be happy; when I get a job, I'll be happy. It's during these times and these preparation points that we are being molded and shaped and even though I would like to discount those times and forget about them, that's the last thing I should do! I need to hold them at close distance, and learn from them. Then I'm that much wiser the next time a decision is to be made or a new journey is to be taken.

These are very personal thoughts. I believe this is how God speaks to me, even if it seems he is far from me. Pain causes growth, pain and growth both cause my relationship with God to move to new levels.

Rambling

Today I just feel like rambling. Like, first of all, I just started my new knitting project, a sweater, that's going to be baby blue. The yarn is quite pretty. It's made out of wool and llama.

What I really want to ramble about is something else. Something that I really want to talk about, but feel that if I do, I'll jinx it. So it has to wait until Monday. Then I'll write about it. And no, I'm not pregnant. At least, I don't think I am!

I ate two cookies after my lunch. I was hungry, but I need to learn that eating a lot at once isn't good for my stomach! Now I have a stomach ache! And the cookies were delicious.

I hope my husband gets home soon. He had to travel across the state today. Well, not all the way across, just to a town north of Jamestown. Still, what a bore! There he is! He just walked in the door! Now it's time for him to call the placing agency that's hopefully going to help him find a job! WOO HOO!

So...what shall I write now? I have a dozen things going through my mind, and nothing that I can pin point enough to write.

Like my friend, Erin, I have started a purging process in my house. I went through all of my husband's clothes and found 3 bags full of crap that can be donated, and another pile of crap that I threw away. I found some more from my closet that I can try to sell. It felt so good. Then I started on the bookshelves. So far I've found a stack of books at least a foot tall that I have never read, and another stack that I'm going to pitch or donate. I still have another bookshelf to go through.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah......

Life

I'm coming to realize that life is more than just careers and money and success. I guess I'm getting older or something. One of my friends from seminary always used to ask me, whenever I was agonizing over a job situation (of which there have been many...), "what are your goals?"

So, I've been forced to ponder my goals again.

My goals include the following:
having a successful marriage
raising God-loving children
having a nice house
being a good neighbor
helping people have good marriages

When I would list these things for her, she would always say, "Do any of those really have anything to do with your job?" They don't, specifically, but one must have a job in order to accomplish these things. Right now, I hardly have a job. I've completed 3 hours of therapy this MONTH, and very few hours working on the adoption agency licensure process. Things are not looking up. But, I'm not going to complain. I'm just going to do something about it. I'm going to do whatever it takes.

I think I've been going the wrong direction in life for a while. But, I think I'm figuring things out. I feel very blessed by God right now. The biggest thing that's happened is that we've finally found a church to call home. It's taken 7 months, but we've done it! I feel that this is the center of my life and that the rest of everything else is going to fall into place around it. I have a sort of peace. Now, I can realize that even if I'm not working with people to help them have better marriages for my job, at least I'll have a place to do it at church!

So, my next question is this: can one think one is in the place that God has planned for one, but suddenly realize that this place wasn't the right one? I suppose it's easy to do that, now that I think about it. We can never really see the whole picture, and maybe that place you thought was the right place, really was for the moment, to get you to a new place. Maybe there are no wrong places, only detours, or pit-stops in order to refuel. That's what I'm going to think of this last juncture of life as: a pit stop in order to refuel! When you're trying to follow God's will, maybe there aren't wrong places to be. Hmmm.

All of this stemmed from a conversation I had last night about the 9th and 10th commandments: Do not covet your neighbor's house, or his wife, or his manservant or maidservant. Do not covet his donkey or anything that is his. (paraphrased) Let's just say that Heather needed to be reminded about this....

Yarn Fondling

Today I was pleasantly surprised with an invitation to Atomic Coffee with Dana and Erin. I got there late, but coffee, conversation, and knitting were all good. I had my usual 16 oz iced vanilla skim latte. That's the "usual." I also had an "orange cranberry cookie muffin with walnuts" that was organic. That, too, was quite tasty!

I'm almost done with my current project. I project that I will finish it tonight. Needless to say, I've got the yarn already for my next project...hence, the title of my blog today.

I had never been to Yarn Renaissance before, so Dana and I made an outing there today and I found out the gloriousness that is Y.R. I found this one particular yarn that included purples, dark blues, yellow, and greens, that I nearly licked, it was so beautiful. (I fondled this one extra long...hee hee.) So, I've already got the yarn out and have begun knitting a swatch, which I believe will always befuddle me. I do not understand completely the swatch, and hence, I find myself knitting for no particular reason! But, because of the beautiful light blueness of the yarn, I am happy, nonetheless.

Chris' friend, Aaron, is here visiting from the Twin Cities. He came up last night, and we watched "Meet the Fockers," which I had forgotten was very, very sexual. It was still a good laugh, needless to say. Today they went to a free pancake breakfast, the motorcycle show, and lunch at a pizza buffet. Now they are watching College Basketball, while Chris periodically naps. I think this day must have been heaven for the two (free food, motorcycles, pizza buffet, and sports on TV, mixed with napping...and Chris gets to hold the remote...)

New Subject**
I was inspired by Erin's blog concerning her year of purging and cleansing. I have often thought about going through all of our stuff and seeing what can be tossed/donated and what can be reorganized. Considering it took me 6 months to file all our bills and paperwork, this could be an endless project for me, if I choose to accept it. I think I will start with having Chris go through his clothing and getting rid of old, nasty t-shirts, and hawaiian shirts that are faded and ugly.

I discovered a new little obsession of mine - consignment clothing stores. There's one in Moorhead that I just located yesterday where I found my newest pair of favorite shoes for $7, an angora sweater for $8, and an Italian merino wool sweater for $12. You can't beat that. They're all very stylish and in great condition. I love good finds.

Well, I need to go prepare food for supper. It's meatloaf tonight...one of Chris' faves. I do not understand this, nor do I try. I only aim to please....

Fun times and tax rebates

My friend, Kris, from the Twin Cities just went home. She came for a short visit, but we had fun! We went shopping and shopping and shopping! This morning we went to Nicole's for pastry and coffee - scrumptious!!! She said Nicole's was her new favorite place in the world.
Last night we went to Starbucks for coffee and knitting, and my friends from Fargo, Dana and Wendy, met us there.

I never know how it's going to go when you mix two groups of friends, but I have such great friends all around that it was just fine, I'm happy to report! We had wonderful coffee (I tried their caramel macchiato for the first time, iced - and it was GRANDE (pun intended)), and we had good conversation - nothing earth shattering, but there weren't long, uncomfortable pauses, like there can be when two groups of people get together who don't know each other. :) AND...I finished the knitting stage of the bag I'm making my mother! WOO HOO.

This last sentence is noteworthy because I've been working on this bag for FOREVER, as it is the second one I made. This one is for my mother because once she found out I was making one for Kris, she decided she had to have one herself. But now....I get to work on something I really want to make for myself...a sweater! I've found one from Interweave Knits that I really want to do, but it looks very difficult. I'm going to attempt it anyway...

And, lastly, we got our tax rebates this week. Directly deposited into our checking account. There is nothing better. Ahhhhhh.......

Air Time

Whew! I just got off the phone with Laurie Lind from KFNW, the local Christian radio station here in Fargo! We did a phone interview and she asked me questions about cohabitation and the deterioration of marriage, as well as accountability in marriage. It went great! I only fumbled over my words once, and recovered quickly, and I think I said some good, interesting things! I feel great. I even got to plug my new group that I'm starting in 3 weeks based on the book Saving Your Second Marriage Before it Starts. I'll be on the air this afternoon sometime, so I'm going to listen all day long and make sure don't miss myself! WOO HOO! I'm super excited about this whole ordeal!

I have to say that it's fun to have a blog. It's a creative space for my to put my thoughts. I always have wanted to write a book, and this is a place where I can test out ideas!

My best friend, Kris, is coming to visit me this afternoon! She's spending the night with us and heading back to the Twin Cities tomorrow. I'm super excited! We're going to go shopping and eat pizza and knit and drink coffee!!! Starbucks, here we come!

Along Came Heather

Egad. I never thought I'd do it, but here I am, typing my little heart out in my own blog! I slaved over the name, and was very pleased with myself, as I am a coffee fiend. You will notice in the days and weeks to come that coffee can sometimes rule my day, so to speak, and that this is usually a good thing!

My big accomplishment for the day? I completed (finally) the application for licensure as a child placing agency in the State of North Dakota! The people that I work with/for have been wanting to start an adoption agency and were waiting for the right person to come along to run the thing, and one day, along came Heather. So now we wait...again...last time it took 6 weeks to hear back from the State (this is round number 2). Let's all hope that it doesn't take so long this time.

I am going home now...to an empty apartment, as my husband is still out in the middle of North Dakota on his way home from work (we won't go into that). He's also visiting his sick aunt. And that's aunt pronounced awnt. I've always pronounced it "ant." I suppose if you were to pronounce it the way it's spelled, it would be "ownt," wouldn't it?!?! Anyway, there, in my apartment, I will exercise (walk on my treadmill), and fix myself something tasty to eat. (Reminds me of Isaac in Genesis asking his son Esau to go and hunt something to he can have something tasty to eat.)

Enough.
Good night.